"The Leopard cannot change its spots. Nor the tiger its stripes. Maybe we can change the way we see it"
It is very rare that in modern television and documentary that one can find such powerful and incredibly insightful rhetoric. Nor is it possible to find a program so rich in personal connections and adeptly aligned, in a figurative sense at least, to daily life. For this reason, I adore Shark Week.
The plot structure of shark week program is so engaging and heart wrenching. It has all of the drama and heartache of Shakespeare and Tolstoy, along with the perversion of Nabokov and the glittery grit of Palchiuk. Shark Bite Summer and a Tale of Two Tiger Sharks ( i may have made up that title but i think it is oh so fitting), are two of my recent finds. Even the titles make for so much anticipation on the part of viewers.
Now I am for the most part not an extremely emotionally sappy person. However, as I watched a man recall in agony about the time he almost lost his 14 pound terrier to a shark i was almost moved to tears, kind of like the time i watched the christian the lion video which portrays lions reunited with their rescuers after 20 years of separation. You would cry to if you saw 200 pound lions docilely reuniting with british people while whitney bellows, "anddddd I-eee-Ieee I will alwayssss lovvvvee yooouuouou". It was almost as heartwrenching to hear the terrier's owner recount the lessons he learned, "I will never let that little dog get so close to water again." I wonder i the story would have been different if the Terrier had been a Great Dane.
While Shark week has led me to sympathize with other human beings, it has also made me realize that I, too, have endured the trauma of a shark attack. Though, of course, my shark attacks have all occured on dry land. I have pulled a few examples of where shark attack rhetoric is certainly applicable to shark attacks on dry land, most specifically in ultra lounges and clubs.
On Shark Bite Summer one victim recounts ever so profoundly "i felt something chewing on my leg, i turned around and saw this huge... dorsal fin." Now, in terms of bar speak, this could readily be translated into an incident of a total guido grinding up on you without consent or awareness underneath flashing lights and pulsing beats. However, as it does take two to tango, shark experts with prententious british accents warn, "its the risk you took going into their environment". This holds true for the club, too. You made the choice to wear that hoochie skirt so you better know how to deal with that dorsal fin. This is because, at the end of the day, sharks and bar guido sharks mistaken your movements for "the kind of splashing sharks always confuse with prey in distress". Bottom line? Don't be vulnerable, don't be stupid and know your territory... as well as theirs.
Just a little food for thought.
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