The Good Samaritan

All in all, my roommate Noreen is a very genial person. She loves to help people, especially strangers. On one occasion, when we first moved into our new complex, Noreen got lost coming home one night amid the spindling paths and frequent waterfalls and Giverny bridges. While she meandered around, she heard the soft murmurs of someone crying. As she came closer to the muddled howls, she saw it was actually a man. 

"What's wrong, sir?" she asked.

"I'm locked out of my house," said Crying Man through heaving sobs, "I don't know WHAT to doooooo!"

Noreen didn't either; I mean, she wasn't going to invite a stranger into the house. That would just be unsafe.  She did, however, console Crying Man so that he felt better and he ended up directing her back to our apartment. Ask and you will receive, I suppose. Noreen probably has great karma by now.

This weekend she took up her good deeds again by helping who we will refer to, for all intensive purposes, as the Fallen Man. While at a Jewish deli with our friend Jen on a Sunday afternoon, Noreen and Jen were lunching when out of the corner of her eye Noreen witnessed a large old man bite it on the street curb. As she described it,

" It was the longest fall I've ever seen. I mean the man hit a table and two chairs on the way down! He had so many chances to catch himself!"

Now, I don't know what is so funny about people falling, but this is probably one of the funniest accident stories I have heard in a while. While living in ice laden Michigan, I used to witness people going down right and left all winter long. Here, I do not have that priviledge.

Noreen continued her story:

"So I called the ambulance. I mean the man was groaning and I didn't think I should move him."

So here poor little Noreen was, doing a good deed when, all of the sudden, the owner of the restaurant slipped out the door and handed the man a card and whispered something in his ear.

Within moments, the man got up and hobbled to his car. "I think the owner settled the matter discretely," Noreen presumed, "I mean to avoid a lawsuit."

Apparently, as the man backed out, he almost hit two cars. Noreen said he definitely should not have been driving. "Then I had to call and cancel the ambulance," Noreen said... I wondered how awkward that would be, I mean, who cancels an emergency service? What do you say, "Hey paramedics, I'm sorry but you know that old man who might have a concusion that was moaning in agony a minute ago? Yeah, well, he just got in his car and drove away." 

And this, my friends, is why there are so many car accidents in Phoenix.